Judy

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Judy wanted me to move out, which I gladly agreed. Serena said she was surprised that I stayed for so long – 4.5 years – when I told her I […]

Insignificant truth about us

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A few years after I saw Madame Butterfly, I was in Tokyo to go to university. I took English lessons outside the school to prepare for the study abroad program. […]

Ghost of Madame Butterfly

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I first became aware of my identity in the context of race and gender when I watched (forced to watch) opera Madame Butterfly in the high school music class. A […]

Identity

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Being identified as a Japanese woman gave me so much shame. People call us “subservient” as if we are a punching bag. “Stupid,” “naive,” “meek,” “timid,” “loose,” are other descriptions […]

Zen effect

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I went on a meditation retreat because that was what woke people of the Bay Area did when they needed an assurance that they were not just the cog of […]

Truth as cliché

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I had been reluctant to talk about my truth. I feared that my truth, once spoken, may separate from me as an individual story, to be caught by others to […]

Therapy

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In January 2019, I started seeing a therapist. I had seen therapists in the past, but this time I chose an Asian therapist who was female. Never again I’d see […]

Hunger pain

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In my research for improving my gut health after H-pylori treatment with antibiotics in 2018, I learned that as a C-section baby, I had a weaker immune system in the […]

Beginning

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I have a piece of memory. I am latching onto my mother’s breast sucking milk. Mother is sitting by her dresser in the bedroom. The room is dimly lit by […]