I don’t remember how the breakdown unfolded. I believe I called Stuart and told him about the call and everything that happened since my relocation was agreed upon. I might have cried into the phone, or I might have been dead calm when I told the story. He might have cursed with anger or cried with compassion. What I do remember is that I finally came to realize why I wasn’t thriving at work. I had been deprived of opportunities to do so.
What options did I have? Beg Mr. N for forgiveness and reconstruct my discredited position? No f***ing way. I told Stuart that I needed to leave earlier, not three more years like we had initially planned. I’d start preparing the application for a business school to enroll in the following summer. Stuart agreed. I needed to earn a tuition fee in the meantime, so my plan was to stay with the company until May or June. It was 9 to 10 months away. I needed to keep sanity until then.
So since then, I ceased my futile effort to make myself valuable at work.